REAL MEN Don't Dance!

and other out-dated proverbs from my childhood.

(I am really dating myself here. Just back from a family wedding where everyone danced their pettooties off! All ages, all styles. Even a botched attempt at tango. So apparently, hopefully, anything I say below is only relevant to an old-time fart like me. We can always hope.)

In my formative years, REAL MEN didn’t dance. We played sports. Sure, I had a lot of fun for a lot of years around the ice rink, pretending I was NHL bound. But at some point the fantasies start wearing a little thin and it is time to trade them in for your place in the work-a-day world.

 So what does a REAL MAN do when he is past his best before date and most of his time is spent behind a keyboard or in a bored-room (sic)?

Option #1. Spectator sports.

Settle into a couch and watch others live our dream vicariously. Do TV sports, e.g., channel-surfing, armchair-quarterbacking.


Option #2. Dance

Get off the couch and onto the dance floor. 

Sure, this violates everything we were ever taught about maleness. But let’s face it. As balding post-middle-aged men it is time to move on. The classic model of machismo no longer serves. Time to grow, change, risk our egos and try something totally new. 

But why dance? 

Dance completely changes the rules of the game. It teaches us new ways of being in our bodies and in relationships that are far more fitting and functional in our adult years than virtually anything else I can think of. 

Compare to sports for example.

Dance is cooperative - not competitive.

It teaches power alongside vs. power over.

There is no win-lose but rather a cooperative creativity.

There is no keeping score. Dancing is mutually affirming.

Dance is all pleasure, no pain (at least that is the intention). We attend to our bodies and our partner’s to ensure that we are maxing out the bliss factor. 

Society needs a new model of maleness.

This is the clarion call. Man equals hunter-gatherer equals warrior equals combatant equals equals consumer no longer sustains relationships or life on this planet. Time to change. Trade in those skates and cleats for dance shoes.